“Shit Heathens and Norse Pagans Say”

  •  Asatru: “…when people were practicing Asatru, back in the Viking Age…”
  •  Folkish Asatru: “Our goal is cultural diversity. Ours is a culture for the white race. We respect your culture, too, as long as you do it over there, out of my country, where I don’t have to look at it.”
  •  Odinism: “I’m not racist! This bunker of weapons in my basement is to PROTECT the folk from oppression of the white minority.”
  • Theodism: “WE ARE OUR DEEDS!…except when we do something illegal.”
  •  Reconstructionism: “Today we must do a sacrifice to bless the plow we do not own and pray for a successful planting season on a farm we do not have two months after the planting has already begun in our area.”
  •  Rokkatru: “Why pray to Freyr or Thor when you could pray to this giantess mentioned once in a list of names at the end of the Prose Edda…”
  • Northern Tradition Paganism: “… don’t worry, I can tell you all about her. I met her once in an astral tea-party-turned-BDSM-session. Shamanic ordeals, you know.”
  • Lokean: “I just met him, and this is crazy, but he’s my lover, and here’s our baby.”
  • Nokean: “Loki? A plot device! If you look at this cherry-picked quote from a free source academic article and ignore the ten other deities listed as having no cult, you’ll clearly see that Loki never existed.”
  • Forn Sidr: “My religion? It’s so Scandinavian you’ve probably never heard of it.”
  • American Heathenry: “Our past heathen culture…”
  •  Anglo-Saxon Heathenry: “Why do people always mistake me for Asatru? Wait, what do you mean Skadi wasn’t worshiped in Britain?!”
  •  Heathen Academics: “In Þrymskviða stanza 1 Sæmundar-Edda (Guðni Jónsson 1954) Vingþórr awakens ‘vreiðr’ upon finding that one of jǫtunn (PIE ‘h₁ḗd,’ Proto-Germanic substantive ‘etunaz’; here the word is ‘Þurs,’ PIE ‘tur-’ for more on words designating those of giant origin, see footnote) descent has ‘Hlórriða hamar of folginn átta röstum fyr jörð neðan.’”
  •  Heathen Romanticism: “We look back to our Teutonic ancestors, the pure way of our folk spirit, as they felt the promise of new life with the changing seasons and called out to the Goddess of Spring: Eostre, Ostara, Idunn, Nerthus, the Matronae, Aurora, the Lady of the Dawn and Fertility.”
  • Multi-tradition: “I lead an Asatru kindred every Thursday night from 6-8, and on Fridays I tend my altar to Osiris, Isis, and Bastet, and every Sunday night I gather with my friends to do an offering to the Orisha…”
  •  Norse-bent Wicca: “Today we celebrate Winter Nights, or Samhain, with an offering to Freyr, the Horned God, and the maiden-crone Freyja as the world darkens and the God’s power wanes from this earth.”
  • Heathen “Frithkeepers:” “Come on, everyone! Be nice! We all worship the same Gods! Think of the wyrd! Think of the frith! This is a grithstad!!”
  • Scandinavian Heathenry: “…Guys? What are you doing?”

Source: http://lokason.tumblr.com/post/67476186440/shit-heathens-and-norse-pagans-say

About Amber Drake

AKA Darkamber.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to “Shit Heathens and Norse Pagans Say”

  1. We Bring The Fire says:

    Reblogged this on We Bring The Fire.

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